That’s Deep Podcast: Personal Development for Empaths

15
Mar

Tired of Being Taken Advantage of as an Empath?

Join Naomi for an audio replay of her livestream on the topic of Empaths and the common frustration of feeling like you're being taken advantage of.
Here's some reasons why we feel like we’re often being taken advantage of as empaths:
  • We are natural over-givers in our relationships. We take on too much.
  • Unequal energy exchanges (you’re the only one putting in effort and giving)
  • Co-dependent relationships (watch some of my previous livestreams for more info on this)
  • We neglect ourself and our own needs (we put self-care on layaway)
  • This makes us feel overburdened, resentful, and overwhelmed
3 Steps Towards Ending the Cycle of  Being taken advantage of as empaths:
  1. Set and maintain healthy boundaries (catch up on my previous lives to hear me talk more about healthy boundaries)
  2. Take things off of your plate (there is ALWAYS something that you can slash off your list)
  3. Renegotiate any agreements/commitments that are stressing you out or that don’t feel in alignment with you
  4. Remedy those poor communication skills
  5. Be explicit enough in expressing needs
  6. Know your intentions clearly:
  • How do I want to be treated? (With love, autonomy, respect)
  • How do I want to feel? (Empowered, independently, confident, cherished, happy)
  • What don’t I want to feel + experience?
  • Anything out of alignment with this needs to be addressed or needs to go
  • Always take note of how you physically and emotionally feel around people/situations
  • Your body is like an instrument, constantly sending signals to you, giving your signs
  • Check the energy that other people are projecting your way (and what you’re projecting their way)
  • Decide to not experience what other people are experiencing (tell them what your energetic boundaries are)
  • Release the need to save everyone, you just can’t
Here's some actionable pointers for Empaths:
  • Serve yourself first
  • Honor your intentions
  • Stay away from things not in alignment with those intentions you set
If you are an empath who is looking for more one-on-one guidance, I’d love to invite you to join me in the Empath Empowerment Coaching Course.
 
Join me for this 8-week, 1:1 coaching program for empaths who want to understand their gifts, overcome energetic overwhelm, release limiting beliefs, and build better boundaries in their relationships.
 
*For more details on how to work with me, please visit this link: https://naomicourtneycoaching.com/empowered-empath-coaching-course/
5
Mar

Victim Vs. Growth Mindset: Where Do You Stand?

Many empaths struggle with victim mentality. People struggling with victim mentality do typically see themselves as a victim. We don’t want to be there, but we do when we become consumed by our fear-based thoughts.

Get ready for some tough love (in the most compassionate way). Let's go over some key signs of having a victim mentality:

  • Poor me attitude
  • Focused on what others are doing to you
  • Difficulty taking responsibility for one’s own role in their disempowerment
  • The perception that people are always against you
  • Blaming others for not meeting our needs
  • Constantly complaining or venting about life and how you can’t do anything to change your situation

Many factors play into the reason why empaths struggle with victim mentality (ex. co-dependent relationships, past trauma, etc.), but discernment plays a huge role in whether we are operating in victim vs growth mentality as empaths.

Many of us empaths struggle with discernment. But what is discernment exactly?

Discernment: The ability to judge well, distinguishing what is right/wrong for you. It’s the ability to determine the difference between what your truth is and what a lie is.

When we grew up as empaths, we often found ourselves being taught to not trust our intuition by our caregivers or the adults around us.

Maybe your insights got you in trouble and it led you to seek out validation from others and to be fearful of making decisions that felt good to you and your inner knowing.

We might’ve even ended up in a codependent relationship because we can’t trust our own feelings. This big hot mess of disempowerment probably skyrocketed us into fear and a victim mindset. Then we start to think:

  • Will I ever be able to trust my gut?
  • Why can’t I have a mutually satisfying relationship that allows me to feel freedom and autonomy as an individual who is capable of making their own decisions?
  • Will I ever be able to speak my truth and stand strong in what I believe in based on my own judgement?
  • Can I actually feel the fear and accomplish things anyway?
  • Will I feel unfulfilled and disempowered forever?
  • I’ve already tried so hard and it never works

It’s crucial for empaths to validate themselves from within. You are worthy because you are. Not because of anything external you do or achieve. Not because of how proud you make your loved ones.

Once you learn discernment, you’ll be able to trust in your own feelings and intuition more. And with this strong inner trust, you’ll be able to feel more empowered and you will start to trust your ability to achieve a lot more than you think you can.

In NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming), we like to use the formula for success. This refers to the idea that being at cause is greater than being in effect (results are greater than reasons).

Empowerment means moving from being in effect to being at cause. If something isn’t working for you (in an area of life), it’s likely that you’re being at effect or something or something. The responsibility is always on you (harsh truth). You have to do the work for yourself.

I’d love to invite you to join me in the Empath Empowerment Coaching Course. Join me for this 8-week, 1:1 coaching program for empaths who want to understand their gifts, overcome energetic overwhelm, release limiting beliefs, and build better boundaries in their relationships.

*For more details on how to work with me, please visit this link: https://naomicourtneycoaching.com/empowered-empath-coaching-course/

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26
Feb

It’s Not You, It’s My Self-Worth.

Join Naomi for an audio replay of her livestream on the topic of empaths and self-worth.

Many of us empaths have commitment issues. In our relationships, career, and with time and money. It can be hard for us to commit to something just for ourselves (especially because we ALWAYS think of others first).

Somewhere along the journey, we started to believe that we were not worthy of investing in and pouring life back into ourselves.

The following mindset blocks that pop up in our head are:

  • I have no time to commit to myself when I’m taking care of everybody else
  • I can’t afford to spend time or money on myself because I need to make sure everybody else is covered first
  • I don’t believe I can actually get what I want (because I always get what’s left over after everybody else is served first/I just have bad luck)
  • I already feel overwhelmed
  • I need to check in with partner/husband/wife/parent/etc. before I can make decisions about committing to anyone else
  • There are many factors that come into play that create our commitment issues (ex. Difficulty trusting others, past relationship trauma, etc.)

But our self-worth plays a HUGE role!

Let’s clear up some definitions around self-worth, because we see this term being used interchangeably with words like self-confidence, etc. (they’re related but different).

Self-worth: A sense of one’s own value as a human being.

Self-esteem: Confidence and satisfaction in oneself (how you feel about yourself overall).

Self-confidence: Confidence in one’s powers and abilities.

Self-love: Love of self, an appreciation of one’s own worth or virtue.

Here’s how a lack of self- worth shows up in our relationships as empaths:

  • Past trauma doesn’t allow you to fully trust your partner fully + you end up unconsciously/consciously self-sabotaging yourself + the relationship
  • Over-giving, poor boundaries, saying yes too much, and taking too much on
  • Self-sacrifice until the point of energy depletion
  • Fear of conflict + people pleasing
  • Fear of speaking your truth
  • Fear of being rejected
  • Trying to fit the mold (trying to chameleon ourselves) to our partner/family/loved ones, when we are in fact wired very differently

So, if you’re an empath looking for 1:1 guidance with releasing limiting beliefs like these, then having an NLP Life coach could be a very useful tool for you to help you step back into your personal power as an empath!

I’d love to invite you to join me in the Empath Empowerment Coaching Course. Join me for this 8-week, 1:1 coaching program for empaths who want to understand their gifts, overcome energetic overwhelm, release limiting beliefs, and build better boundaries in their relationships.

*For more details on how to work with me, please visit this link: https://naomicourtneycoaching.com/empowered-empath-coaching-course/

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Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/thatsdeep/support

19
Feb

Conflict isn’t bad, it’s necessary.

Join Naomi for her livestream audio replay on the topic of empaths and the fear of conflict.

I share my story on how I used to be deathly afraid of conflict as an empath growing up + in my adulthood. I used to allow myself to be mistreated and taken advantage of (i.e., I was painfully shy, had a hard time speaking up, and let others walk all over me just so I wouldn’t upset the other person or start conflict in fear of being rejected or abandoned).

Example: As a kid, I would discuss my ideas/insights with someone and they’d repeatedly take it and pass it off as their own because I didn’t typically share/speak up (and I wouldn’t say anything or confront the person/problem, then I would feel resentful).

These lessons continue to present themselves in adulthood (it’s normal for all of us). The same lessons will repeat themselves until we’ve finally learned them).

So here's the uncomfortable part. Someone in the online coaching space started copying/duplicating my work, passing it off as their own, and trying to sell it (thanks repeated life lessons).

First, I gave myself space to process my emotions (disappointment, frustration) because it showed me where my boundaries were, CLEARLY.

It was hard to process, because this person actually received a session from me for the same service that they were trying to pass off as their own (I mean, down to using the exact name of my service + what it entails ya'll). Ouch.

I was really hesitant to discuss this today because I was worried about hurting this person's feelings. And while I think people need to be held accountable, I also think cancel culture can be pretty messy and my intention is not to smother this person's light or harm them back.

I know that they can do better and create their own work (they've got it in themselves, they are a powerful creator). Scratching your head in confusion there? I bet you're wondering, "Why are you fuming, Naomi?" Well, I still have compassion for her (yep, you know what I mean if you’re an empath). I know that the copying isn't anything personal, but that it has more to do with them and what they've got going on.

Like they say in the writing community, people “rob and duplicate” as a content creation strategy. But it doesn’t mean plagiarize or steal someone’s intellectual property (that’s a boundary violation for me).

The lesson: It’s important to set and maintain boundaries, even when it’s uncomfortable to be in conflict with someone. It shows both others and yourself how you expect to be treated and what you will/will not tolerate.

It’s also important to speak your truth so you don’t minimize your self-worth and allow people to treat you in just any old way.

Sometimes is conflict petty and not worth bothering with when you’ve got other things to focus on? Yes. But be clear on what your boundaries are when you find yourself facing conflict.

Stronger boundaries = stronger satisfaction in the way you expect to be treated in relationships (romantic, platonic, family).

These types of misconceptions are deeply rooted in self-limiting beliefs. And self-limiting beliefs live in the subconscious mind. Which is why NLP is a great tool to release them.

*For more details on how you can work with me 1:1 for private coaching, please visit this link:

https://thatsdeepco.com/empowered-empath-coaching-course/

*Link to free empath type quiz: https://naomicourtneycoaching.com/empath-quiz/

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12
Feb

So What If They Judge You?

Join Naomi for a live audio replay of her livestream on the topic of empaths and the fear of being judged.

So, there’s this buzz in the online space to “show up,” or “show up and be yourself.” It can be tough for empaths to do this both in their relationships and career.

Here’s 5 common fears that empaths + highly-sensitives face on the topic of being judged:

  1. Fear of being seen
  2. Fear of being judged
  3. Fear of being unprepared for the unknown
  4. Fear of being taken advantage of, rejected, fooled, or lied to
  5. Fear of being persecuted for who we truly are

This makes taking risks tough for empaths.

Here’s the real reason why this comes up for empaths:

  • These fears are all rooted in deep limiting beliefs. Beliefs about what we can/can’t be/do/have.
  • As an empath growing up, sometimes showing up as our true, deeply sensitive selves got us criticized or judged to begin with (persecution wound - trained us to not feel safe while being seen)
  • Imposter syndrome shows up bc we’ve allowed others dictate what success looks like (despite evidence of our past successes)
  • We’re recovering people pleasers and don’t want to start conflict with anyone, even if that means hiding ourselves.
  • We’re highly-sensitive and attuned to the energy and emotions of others (we can sense what others are feeling about us)
  • Can be uncomfortable when you’re this tuned in to the emotions (we start to absorb the feelings of others + feel like their emotional exp. is our responsibility
  • If you’re an empath going through an awakening (waking up in consciousness), this forces us to face our shadow self (the parts of us that aren’t so easy to look at)

What proof of success do you have from your past that prove these fears wrong? (Because the subconscious mind needs proof.)

So, let's talk about the shadow self. This is everything that is unconscious, unexpressed, repressed, or maybe even denied. We all have a shadow self. Deep wounding (ex. childhood trauma) can come up during the healing process.

Our fears/shadows are deeply rooted in limiting beliefs (ex. “I can’t be who I truly am, they’ll judge me” or “I can’t speak my truth because I’ll upset others.” Becoming aware of your shadow self helps you accept yourself more as a whole (so you don’t project wounding onto others).

An old coach of mine once asked me, “What’s the worst that could happen?" Ok, so someone judges you. I mean, they’re probably already doing it, right? But are you still sitting here, living, breathing, and still carrying on with your life despite their judgements? Heck yes you are!

So, if you’re an empath looking for 1:1 guidance with releasing limiting beliefs like these, having an NLP coach can help you reprogram your subconscious mind.

I’d love to invite you to join me in the Empowered Empath Coaching Course. This is my signature 8-week, 1:1 private coaching program for empaths who want to understand their gifts, overcome energetic overwhelm, release limiting beliefs, and build better boundaries in their relationships.

*Link for more details: https://naomicourtneycoaching.com/empowered-empath-coaching-course/

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Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/thatsdeep/support

6
Feb

Seeking Permission Ends NOW

Join Naomi for an audio replay of her livestream on the topic of empaths and co-dependency.

Empaths can often get caught up in codependent relationships:

Co-dependency Defined: An emotional and behavioral condition that affects an individual’s ability to have a healthy, mutually satisfying relationship

These relationships are often one-sided and emotional destructive and toxic.

Characteristics:

  • An exaggerated sense of responsibility for the actions of others
  • Tendency to confuse “love” with “pity”
  • Tendency to do more than their share, all of the time
  • Feeling hurt when their efforts aren’t recognized
  • Lack of trust in self or others
  • Fear of being abandoned or alone
  • Difficulty in identifying own feelings
  • Chronic anger
  • Lying/dishonesty
  • Poor communication
  • Difficulty with making decisions
  • Being dismissive or forgetful or what happens within the relationship on a daily basis

Co-dependent relationships are rooted in many factors, but it's also rooted in limiting beliefs (ex. “I’m not strong enough.”

Here's some examples of how this is actually showing up for us in our lives as empaths.

  • Seeking the advice of others for most of all your decision making
  • Giving your personal power away by seeking permission from others first
  • Not trusting your own intuition

If you’re an empath in a relationship looking for more guidance with releasing limiting beliefs like these so that you can stand in your own personal power in your partnerships…

I’d love to invite you to join me in the Empowered Empath Coaching Course. This is my 8-week, 1:1 coaching program for empaths who want to understand their gifts, overcome energetic overwhelm, release limiting beliefs, and build better boundaries in their relationships.

For more details, please visit:

https://naomicourtneycoaching.com/empowered-empath-coaching-course/

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Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/thatsdeep/support

1
Feb

Here’s The Real Reason Why You’re Feeling Resentment In Your Relationships

Join Naomi in her latest livestream replay where she covers the topic of empaths and feeling resentment in their relationships.

So, why are empaths often people pleasers?

  • Self-image plays into people pleasing: Having poor boundaries is often associated with having low-self worth and esteem.
  • It feels uncomfortable to say “no” because we literally absorb energy as empaths and can take on the emotions of others.
  • Sometimes we believe that other people’s happiness is more important than our own.
  • Empaths have the gift of deep feeling and can be faced with emotional manipulation from boundary crossers.

Does this sound familiar at all? Don't worry, I've been there too. But congratulations because being aware of these things is the first step in deciding that you want to do things differently this time.

So here's what's important to remember:

1. It is vital to remember that you are ALWAYS worthy of an equal energy exchange.

2. Know the different types of boundaries that are commonly crossed with empaths:

  • Verbal: Being yelled or screamed at, being on the receiving end of hateful or even abusive language
  • Psychological/emotional: When someone preys on your self-esteem, manipulates you, makes your feel ashamed when there’s nothing to feel guilty about, being gaslighted, or being constantly criticized.
  • Physical: When someone physically assaults you, harms your property, or inappropriately touches you.

3. Commit to your boundaries:

  • It might feel scary to keep having to experience uncomfortable situations where you have to say “no” when you’re so used to saying yes (it’ll feel foreign at first, but it needs to be built up like a muscle)
  • Lack of commitment to maintaining the boundaries you try to set will have you getting the same results

*A part of the conversation in this podcast episode briefly mentioned the topic of physical abuse. If you or a loved one is experiencing abuse, please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline (Call 1.800.799.SAFE (7233))

Are you an Empath or highly-sensitive person? Have you ever felt resentment in your relationships? Are you interested in building better boundaries?

I'd love to invite you to learn your Empath type! If you haven’t taken my free Empath type quiz yet, use this link to find out your type: https://www.tryinteract.com/share/quiz/5f77e5e6d23d0a0014fc5110

Once you find out your type, you’ll also be emailed a free guided meditation that corresponds to your Empath type and what that type could benefit from.

Looking forward to hearing which type of Empath you are!

Mahalo!

Naomi International Board Certified Life + Success Coach and NLP Practitioner for Empaths

https://naomicourtneycoaching.com/

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25
Jan

Why being highly-sensitive isn’t a weakness

Tune into the replay of Naomi's livestream on the topic of how our sensitivities as empaths are not a weakness.

As Empaths, we think that this is the problem. We feel like just because we’re different, we “can never get what we want, because that’s just the empath struggle.”

As Empaths and highly-sensitives, we have always felt different than others. We were often labeled “too sensitive” by others while growing up (it actually turns out to be a gift.

There are people out there who are just like you:

Incredibly intuitive (many have psychic gifts)

Natural healers who want to help everyone (just want to make everyone happy - unfortunately, even at their own happiness’ expense)

You’re the person that your family, friends, and partners reach out to when they want to feel better

Our real problem is our mindset.

Are you at cause for your life? Or in effect? (Which one is more empowering)

You might have said this before: “I’m just an empath and I’ll always be stuck in relationships that drain me.”

Your words create your thoughts, and your thoughts create your actions, and your actions create your reality

What you’re saying and what you’re putting into the world is what you’ll attract and see.

Your emotions shape your reality as well.

There is only feedback, no failure

If you’ve tried setting boundaries before or attempted to improve your significant relationships in other ways that just haven’t worked yet it just means you’ll have to try different tools and a different route (reassess, not give up).

What’s your Empath type? If you haven’t taken my free Empath type quiz yet, visit the following link to take the assessment: https://www.tryinteract.com/share/quiz/5f77e5e6d23d0a0014fc5110

Once you find out your type, you’ll also be emailed a free guided meditation that corresponds to your Empath type and what that type can benefit from.

Thanks! Looking forward to hearing which type of Empath you are!

Naomi

International Board Certified Life + Success Coach | NLP Practioner for Empaths https://thatsdeepco.com/

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Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/thatsdeep/support

19
Jan

Tired of feeling misunderstood by everyone (including you)?

Join Naomi's replay audio recording of her livestream on the topics of empaths and being misunderstood. Naomi starts by sharing her personal experience with feeling perpetually misunderstood. She also covers the following in the episode:

How we're facing an identity crisis collectively, but especially as empaths

How common it is for empaths to feel misunderstood in their relationships

How we think that as empaths, nobody will EVER be able to make me feel heard/seen (too different)

Harsh Truth: It’s not other people’s job to make you feel understood or seen. That’s our job to do for ourselves first.

Understanding her inner wiring as an empath, introvert, and INFJ personality type really helped Naomi understand her needs on an identity level. It also gave her a new sense of freedom and autonomy in her relationships (because she gets to be her own person).

Here's 7 Reasons Why Identity Should Matter to Us:

When we lack a strong sense of who we are, it’s easier to undermine own sense of self and it’s easier to marginalize ourselves (ex. I’m too shy, I’m too sensitive)

Understanding our identity can help us become aware of + maximize our energy reserves

It builds deeper connections with others/loved ones

It’s important to know ourselves because in order to love ourselves and develop stronger senses of self-worth, and with that....we have to know ourselves. We have to love ourselves first in order to love others (this means you need to get to know yourself + who you are at your core)

You’ll have better influence over your own decisions

When you don’t claim your identity, you become a sitting duck for exploitation of identity

If you don’t know who you are and what motivates you, you feel like you have less control and power over yourself

Identity = connected to your life’s purpose

What’s your Empath type?  If you haven’t taken my free Empath type quiz yet, visit the following link to take the assessment: https://www.tryinteract.com/share/quiz/5f77e5e6d23d0a0014fc5110   Once you find out your type, you’ll also be emailed a free guided meditation that corresponds to your Empath type and what that type can benefit from.    Thanks! Looking forward to hearing which type of Empath you are!    Naomi   International Board Certified Life + Success Coach | NLP Practioner for Empaths  https://thatsdeepco.com/

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16
Jan

Five Things Your Empath Partner Really Wants You To Know About Being In A Relationship With Them

Join Naomi in the replay of her livestream where she shares 5 Common Empath Problems in Relationships:

Not seeing eye-to-eye with your partner/family member - seeing things differently

Feeling misunderstood, not feeling heard/seen, losing your sense of identity/individuality

Difficulty with holding healthy boundaries

Absorbing the energy of their loved one

Savior syndrome, wanting to fix them

Here's 5 things the empath you’re in a relationship wants you to know:

Be patient with us: We are highly-sensitive and conflict can be very distressing to us because we deeply feel the energy and emotions of both of us.

Be supportive: We need someone to believe in us and show us that our deep gift of feeling isn’t crazy or made up.

Don’t deny our experiences just because they’re different than yours.

Respect our autonomy: Our worst nightmare is to be controlled. Give us the freedom that we deserve.

Deep connections are a must: We are worthy of an equal energy exchange.

Respect that we might be experiencing a different reality than you do:

We each perceive the world and make decisions differently, based on your own inner wiring

Knowing our personality type and profile as an empath helps us to hold space for each others differences

Are you an Empath or in a relationship with one? Join our discussion on common empath struggles in relationships and the key things that the empath that you're in a relationship with really wants you to know.  What’s your Empath type?  If you haven’t taken my free Empath type quiz yet, visit the following link to take the assessment: https://www.tryinteract.com/share/quiz/5f77e5e6d23d0a0014fc5110  Once you find out your type, you’ll also be emailed a free guided meditation that corresponds to your Empath type and what that type can benefit from.   Thanks! Looking forward to hearing which type of Empath you are!   Naomi  International Board Certified Life + Success Coach | NLP Practioner for Empaths  https://thatsdeepco.com/

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